That nasty four letter word....

Sleigh bells ring, are you listening,
(There are no sleighs here in this city)
In the lane, snow is glistening
(Yeah, its glistening but thats from all the rock salt)
A beautiful sight,
(Not in my neighborhood)
We're happy tonight.
(I have a cold)
Walking in a winter wonderland.
(I cant walk anywhere. The snow is up to my knees)

Gone away is the bluebird,
(He was smart)
Here to stay is a new bird
(Hes stupid)
He sings a love song,
(Now why the hell would he do that)
As we go along,
(Im not going anywhere til my car is cleaned off)
Walking in a winter wonderland.
(Im not walking through this)

In the meadow we can build a snowman,
(No meadows here)
Then pretend that he is Parson Brown
(What the heck is Parsons Brown)

He'll say: Are you married?
(nosey isnt he)
We'll say: No man,
(hahahahaha)
But you can do the job
When you're in town.
(that sounds a little ummm perverted)

Later on, we'll conspire,
(And plot against mother nature)
As we dream by the fire
(Now that sounds like a good idea but I dont have a fire)
To face unafraid,
The plans that we've made,
(Plans? What plans? Why wasnt I told?)
Walking in a winter wonderland.
(I dont ski either)

In the meadow we can build a snowman,
(Once again, no meadow)
And pretend that he's a circus clown
(LB would be so afraid)
We'll have lots of fun with mister snowman,
(How much fun can be had with someone with a carrot for a nose)
Until the other kids knock him down.
(Oh they will do that for sure)

When it snows, ain't it thrilling,
(Its pretty but I hate driving in it)
Though your nose gets a chilling
(and the rest of your body too)
We'll frolic and play, the Eskimo way,
(Thats because they are used to this crap)
Walking in a winter wonderland.
(Just give me a snowmobile and I will be happy)

Yes , it is finally Winter here in Upstate New York. We have gotten a little snow here and there but there is about 3 feet of it out there right now. I got two days off from school so thats a bonus. I have to work tomorrow and then I get a whole week off. Oh and I also have a cold again. Never fails that I am sick for a vacation.

I went down yesterday in the middle of the storm to take pictures and there was some idiot in front of my house with a minivan, stuck. Well hell, thats a bright thing to do. Come down a street that isnt plowed, with a vehicle thats not made for snow. And my poor car is in the back of my driveway looking like a giant marshmallow with ears.

There are snow emergencies in every city around here. You can only park on one side of the street for 24 hours and then you have to switch to the other side. If not then you can pick your car up at the local towing garage for a small fee. But at least you wont be buried and have to dig it out. And it will be all cleaned off for you when you pick it up. I think its a fair exchange.

What I dont understand is that you have to go dig your car out so the plow can clean that side of the street. Now where does all that snow go from your car? In the street. How convienent. Now you have to drive over it to get your car out. So now all these cars are stuck in the snow that they just dumped off. Bright idea there.

And then you have the tow truck. The tow truck cant get your car out unless the street is plowed. But they cant plow the street unless the car is moved. To me that is a no-win situation. Entertaining to watch though.

A few years ago, my street was so bogged down that three snow plows got stuck. One got a little ways in and another came to pull him out. That one in turn got stuck as well. A third came in to plow the street and got stuck right in front of my house. The tv news crews were here covering the story of all the people shoveling to get the plows out. I laughed pretty hard that day. And wouldnt you know it, a week later the snow dumped again. Three feet the first time and a little more than three feet the second time. It was a royal pain in the ass here for a while.

Last year, this area was completely missed by every storm that came through. It either slammed north or south of here. We got a total of 13 inches in one drop and that was all. This year, we have had such mild temps that it was sickening. It was in the 70s in the beginning of January. What the hell is that? This isnt Florida.

But we got nailed on the head this time. And there is more coming. Oh joy. At least I have a driveway to park in. Oh yeah, I forgot to mention. I have a neighbor across the street that is too damn lazy to do something about his driveway. So he will be willing to park on the street through all this crap. And when you clean out a spot somewhere, you can guarentee that his car will be there when you return. Last year he did that and that person that did the cleaning parked in that mans driveway and pissed him off. It was funny.

This year, there is no clean spots in front of my house. That way no one will park there for when the plow comes through. I hate when someone does that and the plow goes around and you still have to clean it out. Jackasses. Use your damn driveways. Thats what they are there for.

So tonight I will get some extra sleep so that tomorrow I can take some extra time to get to work. I know there will be every stupid moron out there doing the same thing. Downtown traffic is a nightmare. You would think that these people are used to driving in this crap. Nope. Scares me. Oh yeah, thats right. They all have SUVs but dont know how to stop them. And you may happen across a BMW on someones front lawn.

Fun times ahead. But at least I get to make a snowman. I just have to find some spray paint called Parson Brown.