Saturday, April 30, 2011

Ego Damage Part 2....

The trip out was quite eventful. Firstly, we didnt take the make route. I hate driving the thruway. That is just nuts to me. Yes, it is the faster way to go but I prefer the road off the the side that runs along the whole route to where I need to go. I dont have to worry about cars on my ass or trucks flying around me. Im more relaxed on the country road. I can look at the houses and the small towns along the way. With the thruway, its all fly by and nerve racking. Plus I can stop in the towns to stretch and walk a little and plenty of places to use a bathroom or get a drink. And its much cheaper for gas and such. Some people reading this will understand my issues with thruway rest area bathrooms. Eeewwww.

There are a lot of sites that I like to see along this route. Houses that I like to look at. Most of these towns have old victorian houses that I love and would dream of having as my own. The view is up much higher than the thruway at some points and the view of the Mohawk Valley is beautiful. I make the same amount of time as I would on the highway as I do on the side road. Just better and more relaxing.

We got into town at about 230pm. Not bad timing. We went to the cemetery to see what was there and where my aunt would be buried. We couldnt find the spot as they hadnt dug it up yet. But we needed to take some time as the viewing wouldnt be til 4pm. We stopped off to BK again to get a drink and use the bathroom. Cami needed to change her clothes too. She always brings a change of clothes in case she gets car sick. Shes known for that. So she wore regular clothes up and changed into something suitable for the funeral home. By the time we got settled and back on the road, it was almost 3pm.

I thought for sure we would head to one of the relatives house first before the funeral home. But my father wanted to go straight in. I told him we wouldnt be allowed to go in til 4pm. He didnt seem to understand this. Yes, we are family but the immediate family would be in early for something more private before everyone else showed up. This immediate family would include her sons and her husband. Yes, siblings were immediate family but this was something different for them. Not us. Its only out of respect for them that we remain outside til 4pm.

The sun was getting hot so I parked in the back lot area. We could see the side parking lot and would see who came in after us. Soon, my cousins and uncle showed up. They went right in and I once again had to tell my father to stay put. Let them have their private time first. They still had to do a final meeting with the funeral directer and the minister first. He wasnt thrilled but remained in the car.

He remained til about 345 and then needed to use the bathroom. I cant say no because I needed to as well. So we went up to the door and they let us in after asking if we were family. He still didnt understand this. But anyway, after all, the time he takes using the bathroom would put us past 4pm. So we went in and did what we needed to do. I had to fix my makeup because my allergies caused my eyes to burn and run. Im not vain. I just prefer to look good.

Upon entering the room where we would have the viewing, my cousin David jumped up and gave me a hug. We hadnt seen each other since we were kids. When I spent my weekends at grandmas, he and his brother were always there and were my closest friends. We did everything together. It was so great to see him. Of course now we are in our 40s. He lives in Dallas and his brother lives in Buffalo. Mark came over and hugged me too. I was just as much in tears for this moment as I was when I went to my aunts casket. I come from a huge family on that side and there are a choice few that I was able to grow up with and play with. I was hoping more of those cousins would be there tonight.

I met the wives of my two cousins and we hit it off right away. Cami met Marks daughter and off they went to a corner to play video games and talk and get to know each other. They were fast friends. David and I chatted about the old times. Mark joined in with all the stories of things we did when we were kids and the trouble we always got into. We talked about how everything at my grandmas house was the same. Two of my uncles lived there with her and remain there. We laughed more than we cried. Soon other family members came in and we all gathered in groups to chat. Most I havent seen since I was a child but it was like time never seperated us. We picked up where we left off. It was great.

Time was ticking down and it was getting after 6pm. I asked my father what he wanted to do and he said he wasnt feeling all that well and wanted to go home instead of getting a room. He doesnt like hotel rooms and neither do I. But the thought of driving two hours home and then back again in the morning was a bit much. But thats what he wanted and who was I to argue.

We left at about 630 with the promise to return in the morning. On the way out, we ran into my Uncle David. I was wondering why he wasnt there with my other uncle and cousin. He said that he was told that the viewing was at 7 to 9pm. I said no, it was 4 to 7pm. So he ran in and said he would see us in the morning. Not like we hadnt seen him recently. We had lunch with him a few days earlier when we came up with my sister. So all was well and we left the funeral home.

The sky was looking a little unsettled and I had heard thunder earlier when we were inside. I wasnt looking forward to the drive home and I was hoping it wouldnt storm and we would make it before dark. Back out onto the side route and I was ready to beat the clock. I know I should have taken the thruway home though. We would have made faster time. But driving on that in a storm wasnt on the top of my thrill list for the day. I had a headache from the pollen and wasnt in the mood to fight traffic.

I could see the storm clouds to the west and they didnt look inviting. I could hear the thunder and see the lightning. This was the picture all the way home. For the next two hours, I was in a panic to make it home before dark and stay ahead of that storm. It looked to be pretty bad. I made it home with about an hour to spare before the storm hit. It was another long sleepless night with the lights on.


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