Rain, Rain, Go Away...
Rain Rain Go Away....
Im sure I used this title once already. But it deserved to be resaid.
Im really getting tired of all this rain. I would like to enjoy my summer sometime this...well... this summer. All day long the news was flashing severe flood warnings for all counties around. In some areas they reported four feet of flooding. Underpasses are glooded out and the warnings include telling people not to use secondary roads. Ummm.... Hello? Mother Nature? I think we have had enough.
Well tonight its raining again. Not just raining, pouring. Its coming down in buckets. Raining cats and dogs. Well, let me explain. I have a dog that needs to go out. The downstairs neighbor has a cat outside that needs to go in.
So tonight, just like any other night, I go out the back door and flip on the switch that lights the inside stairs and the outside yard. Nice little arrangement so I dont have to keep hitting switches. Mindy runs down the steps. I walk after her. There is no way I am about to run down a flight of stairs while wearing rubber Crocs. You know, the ones with the big holes that go around the front. As if the holes on the top of the shoes dont give you enough breathing air.
I opened the door to the back yard and out she went. But she wouldnt go off the step. I told her to hurry and pee and run back in. At that moment, the neighbors cat came up over the fence and meowed. Scared the bejeezes out of me. But I should have expected it. Poor kitty. Always left out in the rain. But then again, he has other families that take care of him too. I wont get into that though.
So I scooted Mindy back inside because she wont let the cat near the door. She gets along with her own cat but not any others. Now I have the task of thinking about how I will get to the other door without getting soaked in the rain. You would think that I would be a rocket scientist to perform this task. Well you are right. And I was not one. Well that was a little confusing. Lets move on, shall we?
Normally there would be enough room to go to the other door considering that it is a long patio under the overhang of my porch upstairs. But nope. Not counting the tent poles and the chairs and all that stuff in the dark that I cant see, there isnt room. But I can scooch between the grill that is on the ground in front of the patio and the post from my porch. Nope. I was met with resistance in the hip from the tent pole that I used to put up the tarp over the grill. Damn. Now what do I do?
I thought about it for all of 10 seconds before I decide to dodge the rain drops. Not and easy task. But remember, Im not a rocket scientist. No matter what they say about me. So I decided to make a run for it. I can take about 2/3rds of the trip under the tarp. So I make the mad dash across under the tarp. Now mind you that its dark under there because the tarp blocks out the light from the spotlight shining on the rest of the yard. Yep, another stupid idea at the time. But it works to keep the rain off the grill and off me when Im using it. Well, for the most part.
So I took the first step and off I went. Then something happened. Something completely unexpected. I stepped on something and it made an aweful sound. More like a squish and a sploosh and then a splat and a smoosh. No I didnt step on the cat. The sounds would have been completely different. This was me on my rear. On the ground. On a very wet and slippery piece of cardboard that someone left in the mud. Well it didnt do anything for the mud because that was now running down the back of my pants. My shoes were filled with mud and water. My hands were at least a foot into the wet grass, mud and my yard that resembles Lake Erie.
I got up, put the cat in and then I had to decide how to make it back. I guess now it doesnt matter because I look like a drowned rat. Covered in mud and soaked. So I just took a few steps out into the rain and reveled in it. Not like it made a difference. I walked back to my door. Went back up the stairs, opened my kitchen door and told Mindy to go back out and pee. I went back down the stairs and waited for her. I wasnt going back off the steps again. She peed on the grass that was under the tarp so that she wouldnt get wet. I guess shes the rocket scientist.
Im sure I used this title once already. But it deserved to be resaid.
Im really getting tired of all this rain. I would like to enjoy my summer sometime this...well... this summer. All day long the news was flashing severe flood warnings for all counties around. In some areas they reported four feet of flooding. Underpasses are glooded out and the warnings include telling people not to use secondary roads. Ummm.... Hello? Mother Nature? I think we have had enough.
Well tonight its raining again. Not just raining, pouring. Its coming down in buckets. Raining cats and dogs. Well, let me explain. I have a dog that needs to go out. The downstairs neighbor has a cat outside that needs to go in.
So tonight, just like any other night, I go out the back door and flip on the switch that lights the inside stairs and the outside yard. Nice little arrangement so I dont have to keep hitting switches. Mindy runs down the steps. I walk after her. There is no way I am about to run down a flight of stairs while wearing rubber Crocs. You know, the ones with the big holes that go around the front. As if the holes on the top of the shoes dont give you enough breathing air.
I opened the door to the back yard and out she went. But she wouldnt go off the step. I told her to hurry and pee and run back in. At that moment, the neighbors cat came up over the fence and meowed. Scared the bejeezes out of me. But I should have expected it. Poor kitty. Always left out in the rain. But then again, he has other families that take care of him too. I wont get into that though.
So I scooted Mindy back inside because she wont let the cat near the door. She gets along with her own cat but not any others. Now I have the task of thinking about how I will get to the other door without getting soaked in the rain. You would think that I would be a rocket scientist to perform this task. Well you are right. And I was not one. Well that was a little confusing. Lets move on, shall we?
Normally there would be enough room to go to the other door considering that it is a long patio under the overhang of my porch upstairs. But nope. Not counting the tent poles and the chairs and all that stuff in the dark that I cant see, there isnt room. But I can scooch between the grill that is on the ground in front of the patio and the post from my porch. Nope. I was met with resistance in the hip from the tent pole that I used to put up the tarp over the grill. Damn. Now what do I do?
I thought about it for all of 10 seconds before I decide to dodge the rain drops. Not and easy task. But remember, Im not a rocket scientist. No matter what they say about me. So I decided to make a run for it. I can take about 2/3rds of the trip under the tarp. So I make the mad dash across under the tarp. Now mind you that its dark under there because the tarp blocks out the light from the spotlight shining on the rest of the yard. Yep, another stupid idea at the time. But it works to keep the rain off the grill and off me when Im using it. Well, for the most part.
So I took the first step and off I went. Then something happened. Something completely unexpected. I stepped on something and it made an aweful sound. More like a squish and a sploosh and then a splat and a smoosh. No I didnt step on the cat. The sounds would have been completely different. This was me on my rear. On the ground. On a very wet and slippery piece of cardboard that someone left in the mud. Well it didnt do anything for the mud because that was now running down the back of my pants. My shoes were filled with mud and water. My hands were at least a foot into the wet grass, mud and my yard that resembles Lake Erie.
I got up, put the cat in and then I had to decide how to make it back. I guess now it doesnt matter because I look like a drowned rat. Covered in mud and soaked. So I just took a few steps out into the rain and reveled in it. Not like it made a difference. I walked back to my door. Went back up the stairs, opened my kitchen door and told Mindy to go back out and pee. I went back down the stairs and waited for her. I wasnt going back off the steps again. She peed on the grass that was under the tarp so that she wouldnt get wet. I guess shes the rocket scientist.
posted by BC at
11:22 PM
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