Oh look, A rainbow...

Oh Look, A Rainbow...

I loved that part in Bill Cosbys routine. It was about going to the dentist. Something I really hate to do. Its not the dentist himself. I like him. I just dont like needles or things in my face. Its really odd but I have a fear of suffication. I wont go into details about it but you can blame an exboyfriend for that one too. The same one that caused the fear of the dark. I guess the only way to get rid of this fear is to move as far away as possible. But anywho.... enough of that.

I was having alot of problems with a crown. I wont go into details of that but its loose and I keep losing it. Plus I know that I have a couple of fillings that need to be done and some cosmetic work that has faded over the years. But I just dont like going to the dentist. Plus the fact that I dont have dental insurance and I really dont have the cash to do this.

My father was getting pissed off with me not going and the fact that I kept swallowing that expensive crown. Last year I went to a local chain dentist here and it cost a small fortune to get a filling done. But this place is basically a training place for future dentists and they are pretty much using patients as lab rats to learn on. Painful stupidity is what it is. But this is where they learn. And this is where they screwed up a tooth on me too.

So now I get told to make appointments and get everything straightened out before school starts. I know that this isnt all going to be happening at once but thats what he is hoping for. So I made the appointments and also xrays were done the next day so that we could get started on this.

On the 26th was the first appointment. Today is when he is supposed to recement the crown and do the cosmetic work on the three front teeth that I needed done. Then I have a cleaning on Sept 2nd when he will go through my mouth to see what needs to be filled and all that jazz.

I can deal with this. Now mind you that I have been seeing this particular dentist for many years. He has done alot of work in my mouth including two root canals and two crowns. This man also knows my fears and he knows I hate the needles. Its not the needles that I hate but the pain in the ass trying to get them in the right spot. Seems that all the work I get done requires the needles to be placed in the very front or in between the jawbones in the back. That shit hurts like hell. But this guy isnt the type to stick the needle in and wiggle it around. He will make it easier on the pain factor by putting it in and pulling it out and putting it in another spot. No painful wiggling.

He also knows that I get very uncomfortable with having things covering my face. But some procedures require it though. So I have to tough it out sometimes. But he does have a TV in the room so that I can be distracted otherwise. Good call. All the staff there know me and they know what Im like. If it hurts, I may bite. He he he... Nah... Im not a biter. But I will tell you if it hurts. Well I will grunt it anyways.

So I get there for the appointment. I had to be there at 8am. Yeah a little early for me to drive all that way. 45 minutes to be exact. Im tired as hell but I did have a coffee before I left. I then thought about it and Im hoping that it doesnt affect the work. When I drink coffee, I need to pee alot. I dont know why though.

So I get in there and I wait in the waiting room. Soon Im called in and I get up in the banana chair. Those chairs are pretty comfortable. I hand over the crown and flip on the TV to wait for the process to begin. Damnit. I have to go to the bathroom. But I can wait a little. Maybe when he is done putting in the crown and then I will go. That sounds reasonable. I started watching some celebrity show on E! and it was pretty interesting.

He comes in and looks things over and says that he needs to take care of some extra work on the tooth where the crown was. Not many people realize that under the crowns, damage can occur. Being that mine has been out of my mouth for a couple of years, damage has occured. Ive been keeping it in there with denture cream though. So the gumline is still intact and shaped to the crown. No damage there. Its the tooth itself. Damnit.

My appointment was for a two hour block. There was supposed to be more work to be done but looks like thats not going to happen. But the good news is that the tooth is a root canal and therefore, the nerves are dead. No needle required. YAY!! One of the other worse feelings about that is you cant feel your face for a few hours. Nothing like trying to drink with no face. Makes for a big mess.

So he starts to work on that tooth. I can feel the vibrations from the drill and I dont like this feeling. Especially on a full bladder. But it will be over soon. Wrong. He drills and drills and drills. Then he tells me that he has to insert a couple of pins to support some reconstructive work. What? Damnit. I have to pee. But I cant get up because I cant move with all the cotton and glues and cements and clamps and so on and so on. This is not pleasant. Not to mention the fact that he has to have his hand fully in my face pulling my cheek all the way back to reach the far back tooth.

I was fine while watching tv for a little while but having to lay flat on my back in that chair with hands and suction things in my face was starting to wear on me and breathing was getting difficult. Not to mention the fact that he and his assistant were talking to me. Just small talk. I never understood why they do that. Its not like they can understand my answers. I cant nod and I cant swallow. My tongue is swollen and Im grunting. How pretty that must look.

So finally he put the stuff on and tells me to sit there for a while so that it can set. I cant just sit here. I have to pee. But of course, I wait it out. I was going to say that I was going to bite my tounge about it but thats impossible. I cant feel my tongue because its swollen and shoved to the back of my mouth. I may have swallowed it but I wont know til that sucky thing is out of my mouth. Its stuck to my lower lip and its making strange noises. Will someone at least wet my tongue?

So he comes back and checks the tooth over to see that the coating set. Everything is well on its way now. I was allowed to sit up a little and all that. He knew I was getting uncomfortable before. So then he tells his assistant to make the goop so that he can set the crown back in place. Goodie. I get to go to the bathroom soon. Its only been an hour.

So he gets that all ready and puts the crown in. I have to sit there for a little while more so it can set. I still cant talk and they are asking me stuff and trying to hold conversations with me. Im sure they do this for kicks all day. They must get a thrill from all the uncomfortable grunts. Its like a whole new language.

So that gets done and he tells me that he has time to do one front tooth. Only one. Damnit. I wanted to get all three done so I didnt have to keep doing this. But this time Im allowed a break. An hour and a half in the chair. Im ready to burst. So I take off to the bathroom. Im also allowed a drink. What a shock it was to my tongue. I swear that it had run off and left me. I still couldnt talk though. It was doing all sorts of contorting things in my mouth at this time.

So I return to the chair about five pounds lighter. You would have thought I was a camel or something. Sorry but I really had to go. Im sitting there and I see the needle. Huh? Oh shit. Here we go. So he asks me if I would need it. I asked what he was going to work on and if it would be necessary. He said that it wouldnt be needed if I didnt want it. Well duh. I dont want it then. Im tough. Hell Ive been sitting in this chair with a full bladder while that drill was vibrating my whole body. I can handle it.

So he set out to work on that one front tooth. After he set the filling, he put a piece of tape in between the teeth to set the split. Then put the little blue light to it to set it. I had to wait a few minutes for it to be all done and in the mean time, he starts talking to me about what to do with the others when I come back. I cant talk with the tape between my front teeth. What the hell. Why are they doing this to me? He starts to laugh when I questioned him about it. He tells me that its to relax the patient. Relax my ass. Its downright embarrassing.

Then to make it worse, he takes the tape out and tells me to rinse and spit. Oh I hate this part. Its where all that spit tends to stick to your lip and wont let go. It forms a trail to the bowl and then when it does split, it snaps back and nails you in the chin and down your front. Thats where I started laughing when I thought of the Bill Cosby thing about the rainbow with the line of spit. At that time was when I was hit on the chin with my own.

I was glad to get up and out of there. I did have to go to the bathroom again before I left because it was a long drive home. I wasnt about to have to pull over and go in a bush or anything. Or worse, McDonalds. But before I left the office, I made a couple of more appointments. Also I still have the cleaning on the 2nd. This should be fun because Cami will be with me at that one. But she can sit there and watch Tv for a while. Nothing major at a cleaning and she hasbeen through it a few times herself.

But at least I was able to drink something without missing my lip.