Merry Kiss-my-........

Merry Kiss-my-.......

Fill in the blank. I just cant seem to get into the holiday spirit yet. My uncle is in the hospital and not doing so well. But thats another story. I dont want to get upset again.

So get this.... I needed to get something from the mall last Saturday. Yeah, you heard me correctly. The mall. The mall before Christmas. No I was not out of my mind. I really actually absolutely needed this.

I have an old convection oven on my kitchen counter that we use for everything. I love this thing. But its crapping out. Its one of those really old ones. But it served its years and served them well. Time for a new one. About two months ago I went to Kmart with my daughter and my father. Just doing things as usual. Nothing out of the ordinary. When suddenly, in the housewares section, Im struck by lightning. I wasnt burnt badly so dont worry too much. But this is what I saw. http://www.wards.com/product-2/101456.shtml

Wow was all I could say. I wanted this baby. Why do I suddenly feel so old that Im turned on by kitchen appliances? Oh, never mind. It will serve its purpose nicely. But there was a slight problem. I also needed a new camera and they had a really nice on on sale. I had to choose between the two. I chose the camera. What? Its serving a purpose to my business. I needed it for better photos. So I head to the electronics area instead.

They didnt have my camera in stock. Yeah it was that great of a deal. So I had to go to the Service Desk for a raincheck. Why do they call it a raincheck? Its certainly not raining and it isnt a check for me to spend. Stupid people. But who cares. I was going to get this camera. I think at that moment, I should have put the convection oven on layaway. But I was dumb and didnt think about it at the time. I figured that there was enough of them on the shelf. Boy was I wrong.

Well now we come to the present. I got the camera off layaway on the last day possible. But I still didnt have the cash for the oven. I walked over to the housewares and there was only one left. Oh well. I guess I will have to wait til next year. It was such a great deal though.

Now I bring you to the present. Yeah, I flashbacked a bit. Its always fun to do that. Anywho, things have been going fairly well for the business. Ive been filling orders really fast and gaining some hard earned holiday cash. Im pretty strapped and I needed this. Thank you to all those that ordered from me. It was my pleasure to make something for you and it really did help me to fund my gifts to my family and friends.

So I had enough cash now to go get that oven. But there was a problem. There is always one huh. But this was something that I wasnt thrilled about. Snow. Lots of it too. Coming this way and fast. I needed to do what I needed to do. And it had to be this day. So I grabbed my kid and my father and off to the mall we went. It was packed. I mean beyond packed. I had to drop him off at the door and fight my way to East Bumf@^&* to find a parking spot. I found one though. And I didnt fight anyone for it. I was there first and thats the story Im sticking too.

So I make it to the mall to catch up with my father. I need to get to Kmart fast. But where do I find him? Sitting on a bench in front of the usual place we go to eat. Hes hungry. Ok. I thought about it for a few minutes and I decided that I didnt want to haul that oven all over the mall. So we ate lunch. Then Cami wanted to see Santa. Now mind you that this mall is about a half a mile long. Its known for having walkers. Not shopping ones. Ones that want excersize. Probably because they think its too cold to walk outside. But who cares. I need to do this.

So we went half way down the mall to the area where Santa was set up to do his thing. Not that we havent seen Santa at least 6 times already. Oh and hes still a perv. But this time, Santa was out feeding his reindeer. Try explaining to 20 screaming kids where Santa keeps his reindeer at that mall.

So anywho, my father decides that its time to sit and rest. Santa isnt there so Cami and I head back to Kmart at the end of the mall where we came in. We went to the housewares and hunted high and low. No oven. Damnit. Murphys Law that I have the money and no damn oven. I was not thrilled. So we went back to where I left my father. Good thing that he was still sitting there. I was not about to hunt him down. Did I mention that he carries a cell phone now? I can call and locate him now. But thats besides the point because he cant hear the phone ring in the mall anyways.

So we check out that Santa is now there. But the line is way too long for my patience. So we all decide to head to Sears at the other end of the mall. They are linked with Kmart now. That should provide some reassurance that they would have my oven there. Nope. They only carry Kenmore and they wanted way over the price I was willing to spend. So I left with my head hung low. But not before we had to once again pass the pet store. And with a kid thats begging to pet the animals, thats not an option to pass.

So while in there I fell in love with a cute little bunny and about 10 puppies. This is now going well. This is why I avoid pet stores that have animals. But I was able to let Cami drag me out of there. Ok ok...so it was the other way around. Ok ok... It was me. But I still had to drag her out too.

I checked out TJMax and there was nothing there either. So we headed back to Kmart because I needed a star to put on top of the tree. Yeah Im crazy enough to go through that again. Cami and I picked out a star and headed back to housewares for one more look. Nope. Nothing there. But I needed to pee. So we headed to the far corner. Along the way, they have these set ups in the middle of the aisles for over stock stuff. Stuff that is on sale for the holidays.

Down in the mens section, there was one set up of microwaves. Yeah. In the mens clothing section. Who would have thought? No I dont think she would. Ok so that was an inside joke. Anyways, I decided to take the chance and look there. Well would you look at that? Right before my eyes, in all its shiny glory, was my oven. One left. That one that was spared for me. Yes for me damnit. Its mine. Mine, I say. I dare someone to try to take it from me now.

But there is one problem. I dont have a cart. And Im not leaving my oven to go find one. But wouldnt you know it that there was a young stock boy walking past. My luck is turning to the bright side. I grabbed him to carry it for me. And he even offers to carry it to my car. I told him where I was parked and he laughed. I dont think he knows where such a place is. But who cares. I got my damn oven. So he grabs it and we start heading to the front. There was a lady with an empty cart that offered it to us. Things are really looking up. So we head to the front with that. The lines are way too long.

So I decided to go to the Electronics register and wouldnt you know it, there was no line. So I cashed out with my oven and my star. I headed back out to the mall to where my father was waiting. Oh wait. I didnt tell you how much I paid for it. $80 Yep. $80 Can you believe it? Now you know why I was dead set on getting this thing. And thats with all the extra stuff that Sears cant match.

So I got it out to the car and we start to head home. Oh. I forgot. I still had to pee.